Steve Needs You
by Foxy527
Summary: I don't like the way the writer's have left things with Steve and Catherine. So this is my version of what may have happened if Catherine found out about Steve's last battle with Wo Fat.
1. Chapter 1

**I am a big McRoll fan, so I have been unsettled with how they handled the whole storyline with Catherine. Steve and Cath had reached a level in their relationship that makes it hard for me to believe that she would just leave Steve and never come back. "In the real world', I just don't think it would have happened that way. (Seriously, who could leave Super Seal and NOT come back? Lol) In order to resolve things on my own, I've come up with what I think would've happened if Catherine found out about Steve's last battle with Wo Fat. **

**I do not own Hawaii Five 0 or any of the characters. This is a work of fiction….and how I would've wanted things to play out. It won't be a long story: Maybe 2-3 chapters. Let me know what you think. I love to read reviews! **

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Catherine looked up to see a someone walking up to her dressed in army fatigues. She couldn't stop the sinking feeling in her chest. She excused herself from the women in the village she had been helping to approach him.

"Lieutenant Rollins?"

"Sir?"

"You need to come with me, ma'am. It's about Commander McGarrett."

Catherine felt her heart squeeze in her chest and a lump formed in her throat. "Is he okay?" she managed to whisper out.

"Please come with me, ma'am. Detective Williams can fill you in. I will take you back to base for the call."

Catherine quickly gathered the few necessities she had as she prayed Steve was okay. _God, please let him be okay, _she prayed. Upon reaching the base, Catherine found her way to the command center where she could make a call to Danny. Danny answered on the second ring.

"Danny Williams."

"Danny, it's Catherine. Is Steve okay?" she asked breathlessly.

The silence on the other end of the line was deafening and served to bring Catherine's worst fears to the surface. Tears sprang to her eyes and she gripped the phone tighter. "Danny?" she pleaded.

She heard a sniff on the other end as if Danny was trying to keep his own emotions under control. "It's bad, Cath. It's bad."

"Wh-what happened?" she asked even though she was afraid to know the answer.

"Wo Fat got him. He kidnapped him and had him for 2 days before we found him. We managed to get him in time, but he's messed up." _Oh God, no_. Catherine knew it must have been a death match if Steve and Wo Fat had come face to face again. "He would probably kill me if he knew I called you, but you need to be here. _He_ needs you. He keeps asking about his dad."

Catherine's heart broke. Poor Steve. He had suffered so much already. Lesser men would have crumbled, given up, or been killed by now but not Steve. Steve was strong. Probably the strongest man she had ever known. It is easy to assume a man like that was unbreakable. Or at least that's what they all wanted to believe because the alternative was too frightening. And now they were living it: Steve was broken and needed her. She didn't need to think about what to do. There was only one choice. She had to get to him.

"I'll be there as soon as I can!" And with that, she began the process of getting home to Steve.

It was no easy task getting a flight home from Afghanistan on a moments notice. Fortunately, Catherine had connections and she used them to her favor. It still took her two days…..two of the longest days of her life….but she finally arrived at the Honolulu International Airport to find Danny waiting for her.

Catherine saw the fatigue in Danny's eyes as she approached him and tried to smile. He offered her a weak smile back and grabbed her into a hug. After a few seconds, he released her and they headed to the hospital. Catherine was almost afraid to know, but she had to ask, "How is he doing?"

Danny looked at her briefly before turning back to the road, "Wo Fat messed him up, Cath. He was tortured."

Catherine's eyes closed as if willing herself not to see the pictures springing to her mind.

"This was worse that Korea, though. He was drugged with a hallucinogen at levels that should have killed him but he managed to survive. He was shocked. He was beaten…." Danny stopped to take a breath and get his emotions back in control. Catherine noticed him gripping the steering wheel she was surprised it didn't shatter in his hands. Reaching a hand out, she touched his arm. Danny glanced over at her and saw the tears in her eyes.

"It'll be okay now though. You are here." he offered her a weak smile and she squeezed his arm.

They reached the hospital and Danny quickly escorted Catherine to the Intensive Care Unit where Steve was being treated. Chin, Kono, and Lou were all there as well and they quickly exchanged greetings. It didn't escape Catherine's notice that all of them looked weary and tired. They also looked afraid. _This must be bad._

After getting an update on Steve's condition, Danny took her hand to lead her to Steve's room. Steve had extensive burns on his body from the electric shocks. He had broken ribs, a broken wrist, multiple cuts which had required stitches, and deep bruising all over his body. Hearing the list of injuries was almost too much for her to take. Danny stopped her just before they entered Steve's room. "Are you ready, hon?"

She honestly didn't know. She had seen Steve hurt before, but this sounded worse than anything he had experienced in the past. Was she ready? No, she wasn't ready….but she had to see him. She shook her head slowly.

"They are still trying to get the drugs out of his system, so he has been in and out of consciousness since we brought him in. Don't be surprised if he asks about his dad. He's been asking about his dad a lot. And you….He's been asking for _you_."

Danny led Catherine into the room where Steve lay asleep on the bed. Catherine wasn't prepared for what she saw. Her hand flew to her mouth as tears filled her eyes and began falling down her cheeks. Her poor, sweet Steve. He was sleeping as she rushed to his side so she could reach out to touch his bruised and battered face. She caressed his cheek and leaned down to kiss him softly where her hand had just been. He started to stir and she frantically began wiping the tears away.

"Steve?" she asked hopefully. "Steve, it's Catherine."

Steve didn't open his eyes. Just began to toss his head from side to side as if trying to get away from a bad dream. "Catherine. Cath…. No….no…NO!" He screamed in anguish before opening his eyes and focusing on the one at his bedside.

Steve couldn't believe what he was seeing. Was she really here? Was his sweet Cath really here? He was afraid to speak. Afraid that speaking might make her go away as it had in his nightmares. He swallowed, paused for just a second, and whispered, "Catherine? Baby, is that you? Please tell me I'm not dreaming." Hearing the endearment shook Catherine to her core. Steve never called her by anything other than her name unless they were alone together. He looked like a frightened little boy as he reached out to take her hand.

Catherine smiled at him and tried to hold back the tears that were insisting to be released. She wanted to be strong for him, but she was so damned happy to have him alive that she could have jumped for joy. "It's me, Steve. I'm here."

And then he cried. Literally cried with relief that his Catherine was there by his side. Seeing Steve cry tore away at what little resolve she had left. This man had been her rock more times than she could count. He had been her rock. Her protector. Her warrior. Her man. And now he was crying with relief at seeing her by his side.

Catherine crawled up into the bed with Steve to hold him close. Hospital policies be damned, she was not going to leave his side until he was strong again.


	2. Chapter 2

**I've been traveling and just got back which explains the delay in an update. Sorry about that! I am pleased to see so many of you have enjoyed this story. I also wanted to say that I know it is out of character for our super SEAL to cry….but the scene in episode 5.07 when the team rescued Steve and he cried at the news that his dad was already dead is what came to mind when I wrote this. That scene literally brought tears to MY eyes: He wanted to cry but tried really hard to get his emotions back in check in front of everyone else. Steve has been through so much. This particular torture at the hands of Wo Fat was one of the most difficult things we've seen him face. I personally believe that it would have brought him to tears to see Catherine again after such an ordeal. (After all, the last time we saw them on screen together, they were saying very emotional "I Love You's" for the first time.) A man can only handle so much. I believe Catherine has always been his anchor, so in my fantasy world, he would become completely vulnerable with her after an ordeal like this. Just my take on things. (smile) I hope you enjoy the next installment. **

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Everyone went home except for Danny, who decided to stay for a while longer with Catherine to take the night shift with Steve. Catherine didn't move from the position she had taken on the bed. While Steve slept, Danny filled her in on how they had found him and what had transpired during the two long days he was with Wo Fat: Steve had been completely disoriented when they found him. So much so that he had asked to see his father when he regained consciousness. Hearing that detail had made Catherine's heart twist in her chest. Danny also told her that Wo Fat had been killed at Steve's hands along with a woman they presumed to be his accomplice. He had been injected with so much hallucinogen that he was _still_ having nightmares and hallucinations. Catherine couldn't conceive what he must have gone through during those dreadful two days. She was almost relieved she hadn't known beforehand that he was missing because she would have lost her mind with worry.

Catherine continued to hold on to Steve and Danny tried to get comfortable in a chair. Both eventually fell asleep. However, restful sleep was not to be had since Steve was still plagued with nightmares. Catherine propped herself up with pillows so that she could essentially cradle Steve. Her arms were wrapped around him and his head rested on her chest. Surprisingly, the nursing staff had turned a blind eye to the sleeping arrangement and allowed Catherine to stay as she was with their patient. After witnessing a couple of the nightmares, Catherine learned to sense them coming on: Steve's body would stiffen, his grip on her would tighten to an almost painful level, and he would mumble and moan as if in pain. Each time, she would pull him closer, hold him tighter and whisper to him "Shhhhh. Steve, it's ok. I am here. You are _safe_." At the sound of Catherine's voice, Steve would visibly calm down and seem to rest again.

During one particularly intense dream, Danny woke up and quietly observed Catherine's calming effect on Steve. If he had not already been in awe of how good she was for Steve, watching this convinced him all the more. She was meant for him; There was no doubt about that. After Steve and Catherine had both fallen back to sleep, a nurse came in to check on Steve and noticed Danny watching them intently.

"Is she his girlfriend?" the nurse whispered.

"Yes. She is his girlfriend….His sounding board…..His anchor. She's the one who makes him seem human."

When the nurse looked at him questioningly, he explained, "Steve is what we call a Super SEAL. He is a control freak; Always in charge and always in control. He is Superman, 007, and Rambo all rolled in to one." He took a breath and sighed as he looked at the two of them, "The man is a _machine_. But Catherine…..Catherine is the one who seems to bring out the humanity in him. Or at least the 'softer side'. No one else does that." Then thinking about it, he smiled and added, "Well, Catherine brings it out in him and so does my Grace. He loves my Gracie….and she loves her Uncle Steve. Those are the two females who bring out the softer side of him."

The nurse smiled knowingly at him. "Well, she certainly seems good for him. This is the first night we haven't had to sedate him in order to help him sleep through his nightmares."

Trying not to wake either one of them, she quickly checked Steve's vitals and left the room again.

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The next morning, Grover was the first one to reach the hospital. Peeking in to the room, he looked at Catherine and Steve sleeping before waking Danny in a whisper.

"How's our boy?" he asked.

"Better I think." Danny answered. "He'll be okay now that Catherine is here."

Catherine awoke at the sound of their voices and smiled at Grover.

"We are glad to have you home." Grover commented in response to her smile.

"I'm happy to _be_ home."

Steve started to stir as well. Fearing another nightmare, Catherine tightened her hold on him. He opened his eyes and looked up at her. There was confusion in his eyes, but she was relieved to see that they looked much more clear than they had the day before. Maybe the drugs were finally working their way out of his system. She said a silent prayer that that was the case.

Steve moved so he laying beside her on the bed and propped himself up on one elbow. He reached out to touch her cheek with his free hand. "Catherine." he whispered and she was reminded how much she loved hearing him say her name. "You're really here?" he asked.

"I'm here" she answered.

"So I wasn't dreaming?"

"No. I'm here. You can thank Danny for that." She turned towards Danny and Steve followed her gaze.

"Thanks, buddy." Steve looked at Danny with sincere appreciation written on his face.

Danny shook his head, "No problem, babe. I just got her home from _Afghanistan_….That's all."

Feeling a little uncomfortable being in Catherine's arms, Steve shifted and moved up so that _he_ was the one holding _her._ He kissed her soundly on the mouth not carrying that Danny and Lou were both in the room. Then, he looked down at her, "So how did you do that by the way?"

"Do what?" asked Catherine.

"How did you get home so quickly? I mean, being where you were, how did you get here so fast?"

Catherine smiled at him, "I have my connections, Commander." Steve looked at her curiously. 'Okay. I cashed in nearly ALL my 'favors', but it was totally worth it. Joe called in some favors, too, so I think we owe him a steak dinner." she kissed him again happy to be back in his arms.

Steve looked from Catherine to Danny to Grover…..and back to Catherine. "I want to go home."

They looked at each other for a few seconds before Catherine spoke. "Okay. Let me see what I can do."

With that, she started to move off of the bed. Before she could get away, he grabbed her arm and pulled her down again to kiss her sweet mouth. "Thank you for coming home. For me."

Catherine reached to touch his cheek affectionately, "Nothing could've kept me away."

She left the room to find the doctor and see about getting Steve released to her care. She figured there was probably nothing else they could do for Steve here anyway. At first, the doctor was a bit reluctant to release Steve. He cautioned that Steve had been through a very difficult ordeal and it was still unclear what kind of psychological damage may have been done; It was not beyond the realm of possibility that Steve could eventually exhibit more pronounced symptoms of PTSD. Catherine had already feared this diagnosis, but she assured the doctor that he would not be left alone until he was back on his feet; both physically and emotionally. She reasoned that being at his home in a familiar environment might be the best thing for him. Eventually, the doctor relented and agreed to release him to Catherine's care.

Catherine returned to Steve's room to share the good news. They were going home! Grover and Danny were both making Steve laugh about something which warmed her heart. For the moment, the shadows that had masked his face and closed him off were gone. At least for the moment. She knew they had a long road ahead, but she also knew that Steve was still in there somewhere. Catherine was determined to get him back. For good.

They all turned in her direction as she entered the room. "Ready to go home, Sailor?" she asked him.

Steve smiled the crooked little smile that she loved so much. It made him look like a little boy but also so damn sexy at the same time. Her heart always did a flip flop when he turned that smile on her.

"You convinced the doc to let him go?" asked Danny.

"As long as he promises to be good. I told the doctor we won't leave him alone for a second until he's back on his feet."

Steve was so happy he could have jumped up and kissed her. Except he was hurting. Every bone and muscle in his body still seemed to be in pain, but having Catherine and his ohana with him made it all more bearable. He held up his fingers as if making a "Boy Scout Oath" and said, "I'll be good. I promise. Just get me home."

Thus, began the process of getting him released and back where he could begin the healing journey ahead.


	3. Chapter 3

It seemed to take forever, but Steve was finally released from the hospital and Catherine drove him home. He was quiet during the ride as he began to remember all of the things he had seen over the last few days. They told him he had been hallucinating or seeing people and things that weren't really there. How is that possible when it all felt so _real_?

He had seen his dad alive. _Alive. _ He had talked to him, laughed with him, and even hugged him. But he also remembered going to his dad's funeral and visiting his dad's grave the last few years, so which was true?

What else had he seen?

He had seen Danny loving Hawaii and happily married to Rachel. Hell, Danny wasn't even wearing those stupid ties anymore. But wait….Danny and Rachel were divorced and Danny really _hated_ Hawaii. Right?

He had seen Chin as a Captain with the HPD. His dad told him Chin was on his way to being the next Chief of Police. But Chin was working with Five-0, so which scenario was true?

Jenna was still alive. Yes, he had seen her too. She was at the hospital asking about her fiancé, Josh. But he had seen Wo Fat kill her, so how could she still be alive?

Kono was a four time World Champion surfer. He had seen her doing a commercial on tv. But how could she be surfing professionally and working with Five-0 at the same time?

Victor Hess was still alive. He and Danny had questioned Victor in the hospital and Danny had even shot him in the leg. Danny was the "bad cop" to Steve's "good cop". That was a switch.

Wait. Kono had mentioned another name. What was it? She had said that Anthony Shue had been the one behind his dad's abduction. She had said that Anthony Shue was an alias used by Wo Fat to do business in the U.S. But he had killed Wo Fat. Or _had_ he?

God, his head was spinning and it was taking too much energy to try to keep everything straight in his head. He was so confused. He just wanted to sleep.

Catherine pulled into the drive and walked around to the passenger side door to help Steve out of the car. He hurt all over. Every muscle in his body seemed to cry out in protest as he tried to get out of the car. All he could think about was getting into the house to lie down and sleep. He felt like he hadn't slept in days even though he knew that wasn't the case. Even though it felt as if he had been awake for weeks, he knew he had slept quite a bit over the last few days. That didn't seem to matter because he still felt exhausted.

Catherine opened the door and held out her hand to him.

"Come on, I'll help you inside."

Steve didn't like accepting help from anyone, but looking at Catherine…._his_ Catherine….with her soft brown eyes and the smile that melted every resolve he ever had inside, he could not resist. At least she was real. He was finding great comfort in knowing she was there by his side. He got out of the car slowly, put his arm around her shoulders, and leaned on her as she helped him inside.

Catherine helped get Steve into his room upstairs. The terror of his last few days had worn him down and she could see the fatigue on his face. Steve was really good at masking emotions, but she was always able to see beyond the bravado and "tough man" exterior to see what was really going on. She wanted to talk to him some more, wanted to find out what he had seen. Getting him to talk about it was going to be key in getting him to heal emotionally. He wasn't going to be able to move on until then. Catherine was determined not to let Steve close himself off and bury it all again. She would take it slow, but they _would_ talk. She would not give him a choice in that matter. However, now was not the time to push. Now he just needed to rest. Steve practically collapsed on the bed and it wasn't long after his head hit the pillow that he was off in dream land again. Only these were dreams he really didn't want to experience.

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Catherine allowed herself a few moments to watch him. She was so relieved to have him alive. Fear had gripped her heart like never before when she had heard Danny's voice on the phone telling her that Steve needed her. She and Steve had been through a hell of a lot since they had been together. Both of them had nearly lost their lives on several occasions, but none of those times had affected them like this. This time was different. It seemed as if a part of Steve was gone; The sparkle normally in his eyes when he looked at her had vanished. Now, his eyes looked vacant. Distant. Something had snuffed out the twinkle in his eyes, but she was determined to get it back. Catherine watched the steady rise and fall of his chest as he slept and realized with new clarity just how much she loved him. She was not going to lose him. Period.

Leaving the room quietly, she made her way downstairs to get some tea and decided on a glass of wine instead. One thing she loved about Steve: He always kept her favorite wine on hand. It didn't matter if he'd seen her two days ago or two months ago, she could always count on a bottle of it being there for her when she came home. Today was no exception. She poured herself a glass and walked into the living room so she could be close by if Steve needed her. She thought about watching tv, but decided against it after seeing nothing interesting on.

A bath. Yes, that would be awesome! Living in a rural village of Afghanistan for a couple of months, she had taken to bathing in rustic showers with mostly cold water. Warm showers were unheard of in that part of the world, let alone a_ bath._ Steve had a garden tub in the hall bathroom which was barely ever used. He had remodeled the bathroom after moving back to Hawaii, and that garden tub had been one upgrade he had added. She never understood why he even had it installed since he was the "2 minute shower" kind of guy from his Navy training. Mary used the bathtub when she visited though, so maybe Steve had put it in for her. Despite his gruff exterior, he loved his sister and bubble baths seemed to be something she loved to do when she visited. Catherine decided to take advantage of it herself.

Taking the bottle of wine with her….in case she needed a refill…..she made her way upstairs. Peeking in on Steve and being assured he was okay for the moment, Catherine filled the tub with bubbles and slipped inside. Oh, this felt like heaven. She turned on some soft music, leaned back, and sipped on her wine as she let the hot water wash away the stress of the last few days.

She didn't notice Steve standing in the doorway watching her until she heard his deep voice. "Mind if I join you, Leutinant?"

Catherine slowly opened her eyes to find him watching her, arms folded, and leaning against the door frame. The twinkle that had been gone from his eyes was back…. along with something else. Something that told her what he really needed and wanted right now.

"Hmmmm, I don't know, Commander. I was kinda enjoying my alone time right now." She teased him, but her smile told him she was thinking otherwise. He made his way to the bathtub and got down on his knees so he was leaning in front of her. He started to lean towards her and grimaced from the pain of cracked ribs. Then, deciding the pain was worth it, he leaned forward a little more until his mouth was just centimeters from hers, "But it will be so much more enjoyable if I join you." Catherine felt the warmth of his voice all the way to her toes….and everywhere else in between. She couldn't have turned him down even if she tried. And honestly, who would want to turn him down? Certainly not Catherine! It had been too long since she had felt his hands on her. She had missed his touch and being in his arms. No one had ever loved her like Steve. He was a very attentive and generous lover, and having him close like this again made her crave his touch.

Her eyes were full of lust as they wandered from his eyes to his mouth and finally to his chest. Steve had the most amazing arms and abs. She loved running her fingers over him and feeling the strength there. Her eyes moved further down until falling to his shorts. He gaze lingered for a moment before looking up and finding him smiling seductively at her. He knew what she was thinking and the look he was giving her could've very easily made her come undone. She'd actually dreamt of that look many times since she had been gone.

"You might need to get rid of some clothes if you want to join me." She whispered in answer to him.

"I was hoping you'd say that." Steve undressed as Catherine looked on in admiration. She hurt for him, though, as she studied the bruises and burn marks covering his beautiful chest. She wanted so badly to kiss all of those sore places and just make them go away. Steve moved somewhat awkwardly and gingerly because of his injuries, but finally moved into the tub and settled behind Catherine. He pulled her to lean against his chest. At first she hesitated fearing she would hurt him, but he pulled her a little more insistently to hold her close to him, "You're not going to hurt me, Cath. This is the best medicine I've had yet. Just let me hold you." Catherine was happy to oblige, but as Steve continued to hold her, the emotions of the last few days began to surface and it wasn't long before the tears she was fighting so hard to keep under control began to slide down her cheeks. It took a few moments before Steve felt the soft shaking of her chest as she tried to hide her tears from him. He sat up straighter. "Cath, what's wrong?" he asked her softly. "Are you crying?"

When she didn't answer, Steve put his hand on her chin to turn her towards him, "Catherine, look at me."

She looked at him with tear filled eyes and tried to swallow the sob that was threatening to release. Taking a deep breath she said, "I've never been so afraid of losing you. When I saw you in the hospital bed…..When I saw what he had done to you…..I could've kicked myself for leaving you."

"You couldn't have known this would happen. None of us could."

"I know. But it's made me realize the chance I took when I decided to stay over there as long as I did. It wasn't worth it. I mean, I know we don't talk about this a lot but…"

Steve chose that moment to lean down and kiss her softly. "I know." He answered in reply. "And I definitely agree you shouldn't have stayed gone so long." His words were serious, but the smile on his face told her he was teasing. Then he turned serious again. "You were doing what you were trained to do, Catherine. You couldn't have known what would happen."

"But I should have been _here._ With _you._"

"You're here _now._ That's all that matters." Steve kissed her again and Catherine turned around so she could straddle his lap. She softly stroked his bruises and leaned in to kiss him again. Pulling away briefly to look him in the eyes, she softly said, "I missed you."

Steve reached up to wipe away a tear that still remained on her cheek. "I missed you too." The look on Steve's face told her what was coming next. He gave her the little sideways smile she loved so much and said, "We have some catching up to do, Lieutenant."


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